1/16/2018

Men's Rights Activist Removes Women From Edited Cut Of 'Star Wars: The Last Jedi'


Damn, and I thought some extremely entitled men cried their share of man-tears over Ghostbusters, I had no idea how far they would go to "own" Star Wars: The Last Jedi.  A men's rights activist has taken a bootleg copy of Rian Johnson's film and edited out every single female, every reference to females, anything that offends his delicate male sensibilities. The result is a 46-minute cut he's titled “The Last Jedi: De-Feminized Fanedit”, that he says is “basically The Last Jedi minus Girlz Powah and other silly stuff."

I can see this guy over on the fainting couch every time Haldo (Laura Dern) gave poor reckless Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac) a tongue lashing. Yeah, he cuts all that out, too, which also has drastic ramifications for Poe, of course. He even cuts out other stuff that has nothing to do with women, although in one instance (Porgs as Chewbacca food) I fully support the change.

Here's a breakdown courtesy of Pedestrian:

“Cut out most shots showing female fighters/pilots and female officers commanding people around/having ideas.“

“NO HALDO (sic)! She simply doesn’t exist. Her whole subplot doesn’t exist. The Kamikaze is carried out by Poe. ( = Poe dies.)“

“Leia never scolds, questions nor demotes Poe. He is a respected and very skilled high-ranking member of the resistance.“

“When there’s a scene where a woman is cut in making some important statement that can be substituted by another statement by a guy, then she gets cut out. Works pretty well actually.“

“Wookie eats the Porg, or at least isn’t interrupted in trying to do so.“

“No green milk.” (What the [frick])

The edited movie was uploaded to The Pirate Bay and the anonymous user wants you to know his thoughts on it. Basically, he digs not having any girls in it (They have cooties, y'know) but he's sorta embarrassed by the technical aspects. Oh, you're embarrassed by THAT, eh?

Obviously it’s far from perfect. The source is not even on DVD-level. Some of the technical edits were slacked because why not, it’s a CAM source (e.g. some masks and Snoke disappearing). Sometimes there’s an extreme zoom despite the mediocre quality. There are plotholes and continuity errors and some cuts are not as smooth as they should be, especially audio transition-wise.

But for what it’s worth, it can now at least be viewed without feeling nauseaus about most of the terrible big and small decisions they made in this film. Also, at least the intro sequence is now very watchable and actually much cooler without all of Leia’s nitpicking. Now it’s all one united Resistance fighting without inner conflict and that’s much more satisfying to watch. Due to the extreme shortening, the whole movie is much more fast-paced now, at times unfortuantely also rushed due to a lack of usable filler footage.

If this piece of crap pops up somewhere within our reach we'll point you to it, but I ain't posting it on the site for obvious reasons. One, every woman I know will smack me in the face. Second, I'm not drawing the ire of Lucasfilm.  At least one man, Rian Johnson, can see the humor in all this: