Yeah, I felt a little pervy sitting in the theater waiting for Donkey Punch to begin. Not quite as bad as when I was the only guy amongst a crowded theater full of girls to see Stick It, but a little dirty nonetheless. I couldn't help but wonder whether the other people were there to see the movie or the titular act. For those that don't know, a Donkey Punch is a particularly disgusting and brutal sexual act which involves the guy punching the woman in the back of the head while in the midst of having sex.
That was not a sentence I ever thought I'd write in a review, and yet there it is. Here's hoping they don't read this when my application to the WAFCA is reviewed.
To be honest, I was a little curious how the scene would be handled. I was also worried that they would "blow their wad" so to speak, and give us the scene too early as a means of hooking us, but thankfully the story was handled with more tact than I would've expected. Three hot girls go out for a night of clubbin' and run into three eager dudes ready to party. The girls agree to go to the boys' yacht to take the fun to a new level. There they meet the fourth guy, who is the older brother of one of the other boys. At this point you've probably realized that I'm leaving out names, and that's because names don't really matter in this movie. The guys are mostly all dickheads, some moreso than others. The girls have little personality other than that two of them are slutty and one is less so.
The party takes a sudden turn for the worse when, in the midst of video taped orgy one of the guys, having been embarassed for his lack of sexual knowledge earlier on, performs a fatal donkey punch on one of the women, breaking her neck instantly. At this point you'd think the natural course of action would be to call the police, but then what kinda film would that be? No, the guys hatch up a plan to save their own skins by dumping the girl's body overboard. The girl's two remaining friends, however, kinda want their friend treated with more respect than that. Nobody wants to see one of their buds hurled into Davey Jones' Locker, no matter how much of a skank biscuit she was.
Belive it or not, this is where the film actually begins to excel, as the remaining six all begin to look out for their own best interests, and paranoia and fear take hold. These are some of my favorite films, character studies that explore the depths some people will sink to in the name of self preservation. In the case of these six, self absorbed cover models, that includes betrayal and wholesale slaughter of everyone else aboard. What was once a fun night out on the town quickly turns into a desperate fight for survival in the high seas.
I gotta admit to being pleasantly surprised. I was afraid it would suffer from a case of "sensationalist marketing", a malady that has stricken many a movie(lookin' at you, Hounddog and Irreversible). But that didn't happen here. What we got, for awhile anyway, is a Hitchockian look at what happens to desperate people stuck in a desperate situation. These people aren't saints, in fact they are all fairly terrible people, if not at the beginning then certainly by the end. The acting isn't great, but it's not distractingly horrible either. In fact, one of the guys who refers to himself as an "international playboy" is so irritating that I have to assume he's a great actor in some capacity. Nobody can be that good at being annoying without some measure of talent.
I just wish the material had stayed a bit more grounded. The psychological warfare amongst the group was satisfying enough, but it's almost as if they felt obligated to turn this into a gorefest, especially in the final act. But that's a minor complaint. Donkey Punch is sexy, darkly comedic, and more fun than it has any right to be. It also teaches a valuable lesson about mixing alcohol, drugs, and experimentation with sexual urban legends. And who doesn't need the occasional reminder about that?
6/10
