Another Halloween, another game to play. I don’t think that was the tagline of the movie; however they may as well have used it. To say that Lions gate is just churning these flicks out now on a time and not a creative basis would not be far off the mark, as this franchise has been sacrificed for the sake of a yearly box office payout. Let’s just get to the “story” and I’ll get to the problems with this movie afterwards. This time around we follow Jigsaw’s supposed successor Detective Hoffman as he sets a game into motion pitting William Easton, a scummy medical insurance executive, against four tests of his will to live and judgment in letting others live. While Easton is completing Jigsaw’s (Hoffman’s) tests, the jigsaw killer himself must evade the FBI and work with the original Jigsaws wife in order to complete OG Jigsaw, John Cramer’s, will. Confused yet? Don’t feel bad, it’s worse in the theater.
I’ll start with what I liked. Honestly the games were good, I really thought this one trick pony would wean on me long ago but dammit if those torture devices aren’t pretty darn entertaining. They keep the creativity coming with more and more elaborate devices, remember Saw 1 when the only device was a hacksaw and a chain? Well as we know from the previous films those days are long gone as we have devices here that an engineer would salivate over, intricate devices of death aplenty. The gore is top notch as well, for those who are into that sort of thing, personally I think the gore should serve as the accentuation and not the subject but if what you’re looking for is gore, Saw VI serves up a’ plenty. The opening scene is pretty bad ass and what the entire movie should’ve been like if you ask me. The film opens with two “Financial predators”; each has a headset that will screw into their brains if they lose. How do they win? By hacking off more flesh than the other can in 1 minute. That’s what Saw was supposed to be all about, someone against a clock with their life on the line doing things no one could ever imagine having to do, like hack off their own beer gut.
Now onto the not so happy side of this review, the shit I couldn’t stand. That’s how much I hated everything not mentioned above, it’s not stuff I didn’t like, it’s straight up shit I COUL D NOT STAND. Now those who read my reviews know that I am adamant about not getting into acting/dialogue details with this type of movie. That being said, I can’t help but to point out how God damned horrific (and not in the intended way), the acting was in this flick, I’ve seen more believable stuff on ‘Guiding Light’….err…not that I watch ‘Guiding Light’ or anything…anyway. Hoffman, John Cramer’s successor to the Jigsaw mantel is awful, I mean really bad, his look, his acting, and his general demeanor ruins the movie. This guy seems like the type that should be the villain’s henchman in an early 90’s B-Movie ala ‘3 Ninjas’, not headlining one of the most successful horror franchises in history. Thankfully Tobin Bell still plays a big part in flashbacks or this thing would be unwatchable. Yet, even with Bell knocking the jigsaw role out of the park the entire storyline outside of the game itself is boring, confusing, and generally unentertaining. You literally have to watch the past 4 Saw films to understand all that’s going on, they harken back to things like it’s a weekly series not realizing that most people haven’t seen the last one in a year and the others in even longer than that. So the side storyline sucks, that means the game must’ve been pretty good, right? WRONG! The game itself is fine, as I said earlier neat traps pretty cool situations but the main problem is the contestant William Easton. This is a guy that you want to kill yourself the second you see him, they make no attempt to let you feel for this guy or even want him to win. In the previous movies you’d have people that messed up their lives in some way but other than that were good, well meaning people. This guy is just a gigantic doucher and they make sure you know that from step one, this flick totally takes Jigsaw’s almost (NOTE: ALMOST) understandable line of thinking, that his game is making people appreciate their lives, and turns it into a revenge story. Even the “twist” ending is bad, even though you do have that ‘OHHHH’ moment you’re so lost in the crap of the side story to really have it hit you, that and the characters involved in the twist are probably two of the worst actors I’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing.
So there ya go…Saw 6 is crap. I’m really let down by this, as I thought Saw 5 would be a great setup movie, they just don’t deliver and stand only to set more up. That’s the thing about a setup, at some point you have to have a payoff you can’t just keep getting yourself ready for next Halloween. There really is no reason to see this movie, if you want a scare go see ‘Paranormal Activity’ or rent ‘Trick R Treat’ both great movies to get you in the Halloween spirit. Saw 6 just leaves you feeling dirty and betrayed and has no completely redeeming qualities. Don’t see this in theaters, don’t rent this, and for God’s sake when it comes on HBO turn the freaking channel.
1/10
