1…2…Freddy’s coming for you! But the question is do you want him to? A complete reimagining of the original New Line classic, there’s not much that you will recognize from the original other than the dream master himself and a much different Nancy. The film opens on Dean, a teen in the middle of a serious caffeine binge, at the Springwood Diner, a hangout for the local teens. Dean’s sleep deprivation is obvious with dark bags under his eyes and a blank stare at everything around him. Succumbing to his body’s need for sleep, Dean drifts from our world to a nightmare world where the Commander-in-Chief is a horribly burned monster with knives for fingers. Just in the nick of time Dean’s girlfriend, Kris (Katie Cassidy), shows up to find out what’s been wrong with him. She’s just in time…just in time that is for Kris to witness the end of Dean’s nightmare and the beginning of hers as Dean seemingly slits his own throat screaming his last words “You’re NOT REAL!” This reminds Kris of her own nightmare and with a little bit of investigation she and Dean aren’t the only ones having these nightmares. The race is now on for Kris and her schoolmates Nancy, Jesse, and Quentin to find out who this burned monster is before they fall asleep and never wake up again.
It’s hard, I mean really really hard to separate these reimagining’s from their originators. To give you an honest fair review I have to forget the original completely and base this film on its own merits. This film on its own does a great job of establishing the lore of Freddy Kruger even if it takes quite a while to get there. Freddy’s back story is seen through a series of nightmare flashbacks experienced by Nancy and Quentin. This proves an effective and unobtrusive way to tell you the necessary details. It really flows well with the rest of the movie. Let’s be honest, we go to horror movies to see the gruesome kills and man does this movie have some nasty moments. The first kill of the film is by far the best and one of the most cringe inducing that I have seen in quite some time. From here the blood flows like water with slashes, cuts, lacerations and impalements exerted upon the teens of Springfield, Ohio. The recreation of the classic Tina kill scene where a girl is lifted off her bed and flung around the room while being sliced by Krueger is sure to leave you wide eyed with a gaping mouth and is arguably the one point where this movie surpasses the original. Another cool aspect of the kills in this flick is the way they show either the dream world or the real world when Freddy’s attacking. Instead of showing you Freddy attacking and then the victim’s reaction in the real world and then back again, they choose to show you one or the other. This leaves you with less dream world action but a more finished feel. Unfortunately, much of this film is flawed and potential wasted.
First off, the pacing of the movie is horribly uneven. It starts off with a bang then slows to a crawl then revs up just fast enough to slow down again before you feel satisfied. You never get fully immersed in the dream world and therefore never really get a feel for what’s terrorizing the kids. Speaking of what’s terrorizing the kids…let’s talk Freddy. NO ONE can play Freddy like Robert Englund, not even an Oscar winner, which has been proven by this film. Jackie Earle Hayley adds a few cool tics to the iconic character but other than that the portrayal falls flat on its horribly disfigured face. I don’t know that Hayley is to blame for this though because the areas that really ruin the character would have been out of his hands. Mainly it’s the look. They went for a more realistic burn victim look, searing the ears to the sides of the head and removing the nose almost completely. It ends up taking all of the personality and humanity out of a figure that thrived on such things. That was the difference between Freddy and the rest of the horror icons, he had style, he had flair, and this version…does not. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, they decided that the practical effects weren’t enough and added some CGI to the face, making him look more cartoonish than anything in some scenes. Besides the fedora and striped sweater the other thing people think of when they think Krueger is the voice, and they somehow managed to screw that up as well. Not only does Hayley use a voice that’s a mix between his Rorschach character from Watchmen and Christian Bale’s Batman but they gave his dialogue a voice over quality. I can see what they were going for by doing this, making it sound more dream-like, but the result is something that takes away from the fear of the scene. Also depleting the fear factor of the movie is the lack of any kind of emotional attachment to the characters. Kris’ storyline is the only one that leaves you giving a crap. Nancy, one of the most iconic horror heroines next to only Laurie Strode of the Halloween series, is reduced to a semi-gothic artsy type who inspires little emotion in the viewer.
As much as it seriously pains me to say so, you should probably skip A Nightmare on Elm Street. If you are looking for a scare and this storyline is up your alley I can highly recommend the original. I know I started this review by saying that I was going to separate the two but I can’t, sorry. The first one’s just too good and this one just sucks that bad. Devoid of fright, this flick is not worth your time and certainly not your hard earned dollar. Platinum Dunes has done a good job with the remakes up until this point with Friday the 13th and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre but the streak stops there. Perhaps one late night when you’re feeling especially tired and this flick is on cable, (pay cable not free…let’s not lose the good stuff), maybe you should check it out…just don’t go out of your way to do so.
2 Out of 5 Guttenbergs
