10/26/2011

*grumble grumble* English language remake of District B13 in the works

Hate. Seething, brain vein popping hate. That's what I feel about this news which I won't spend much time on since it makes me so angry. Luc Besson and his EuraCorp production company's mailout for the American Film Market reveals his plans for an English language remake of his hit French parkour action flick, District B13(or Banlieue 13). The title has been changed to Brick Mansions, and based on the plot synopsis it remains basically unchanged except for the setting....

Chicago suburbs: nobody has control over Brick Mansions. Damien, an undercover cop, is facing an extreme mission: a mass-destruction weapon was stolen by Tremaine, the most powerful drug dealer in the Ghetto and Damien needs to infiltrate the gang to defuse the bomb. To accomplish his mission, he needs help from someone who knows well Brick Mansions: Lino, an expert at getting out of trouble with his extraordinary agility. Lino has had problems with the police in the past, but needs the mission to rescue his sister abducted by Tremaine. Will he accept joining forces with Damien?...Will they succeed in bringing down Tremaine?

That's pretty much all the information we have at this point. There's no director listed, no cast. Nothin', other than Luc Besson listed as a producer. The original was directed by Pierre Morel, who went on to much bigger things a couple years later helming Taken. A District B13 sequel, titled District 13: Ultimatum was released back in '09 and wasn't nearly the groundbreaking experience as the previous film.

Ok, I'm calming down just a tad, but this idea still pisses me off. As much as those who've seen District B13 loved it, nobody is crying for another installment, much less a remake. And action flicks of it's sort are proven to not be big success here anymore, unless they have Jackie Chan in them. Who would be the big name American star who can pull off the crazy free running stunts that separated District B13 from the pack? Nobody. So right now this seems a little early in development, and who knows? Maybe it'll never happen at all?  Fingers crossed. [Twitch]