3/18/2012

Yeah...those Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ain't so "mutant turtley" in their new movie


Thanks to my home Brendon Connelly at BleedingCool for this clip he grabbed from the folks at Stuff We Like, even though it's got my blood boiling on this otherwise lazy Sunday afternoon. As you all know, we're HUGE fans of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles over here at Punch Drunk Critics International, and in particular we're amped over the new live-action film from Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes imprint. With Bay overseeing things and Jonathan Liebesman at the helm, who doesn't expect it to be the most action packed Turtles adventure yet? Right? Right?  Well, actiony though it may be, there are a couple of things that may be missing.  Like 'mutants'. Oh, and 'turtles'.

While discussing the new TMNT animated series for Nickelodeon, Bay also revealed something about the upcoming live-action film, due to open on Christmas Day 2013. What he had to say I don't consider to be much of a holiday gift, though....





In case you couldn't make that out, here's what he said....

Bay: When you see this movie, kids will believe one day that these turtles do exist, when we’re done with this movie. These turtles are form an alien race, and they’re going to be tough, edgy, funny and completely loveable. 

Excuse me, what? Aliens? I mean, I guess it's possible they could be alien turtles, but they wouldn't be our turtles, right? The ones who walked through spilled mutagen and transformed? Either way, this is friggin' stupid. A change for change's sake, and one that doesn't make any rational sense. But worst of all, Bay makes it clear the movie is geared towards kids, meaning we aren't likely to get the gritty, ass stomping ninja action we were hoping for. Instead we'll have a bunch of green E.T.'s with prop swords and Papa Johns logos on their chests. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating, but the hope was for something closer to the dark Eastman and Laird graphic novels. Obviously this ain't gonna be it.