So trill believer, here we are in the New Year 2014 and we
are back to Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. So where’s Coulson? What happened to Coulson? What happened to Mike? Will Skye be less annoying? Just
how many times can Agent May side eye in an episode? Hopefully all these questions can be answered now that it’s starting to bother me and to entertain you
with my spiteful recaps.
So this episode starts three days after the events of the
last episode. Agent Victoria Hand and a large team of agents are with what’s
left of the crew trying to find centipede and Agent Coulson. It seems that Agent Hand
is more focused on catching Centipede than saving Coulson while that bothers
most of the team they go with it...except for Skye. Oh Skye, still trying to
break every rule by using her hacking skills except this time she is denied
because of the SHIELD access bracelet, looks like Agent Hand is putting her foot down. With
Skye’s access cut off and Agent May nowhere near co-signing for her with Hand, the rest of the
team hatches a plan to get Skye off of the Bus (big old plane aka mini carrier) so
that she can help find Coulson in her own special way.
Meanwhile Coulson is being held in an old nuclear test zone
town. You know the ones with all the happy looking mannequins around. There Mr. Po and Reina, the woman in the
flower dress, are keeping Coulson to get him to remember what Tahiti really was.
Coulson being the cold beast of an agent gives them nothing so this makes Mr.
Po choose to torture him which also continues to be unsuccessful. Out in the
world we see Skye trying to use her hacking abilities to follow a money trail
to finding centipede and where they might have Coulson but her
bracelet keeps locking her out from hacking anything. It seems Agent
Hand basically put the uber parental controls on the ENTIRE internet for Skye.
So Skye uses some cunning and cosplays as Agent May and
tricks this smarmy business man into thinking SHIELD is about arrest him unless
he helps her get into his banking transactions, which somehow works. Over at the Coulson trials, Reina and Mr. Po disagree on how to handle Coulson when Mr. Po tries to
flex his connection to the clairvoyant who calls to talk to Reina? The Clairvoyant. When Reina gives the phone back to Mr. Po he is killed
through some crazy blue virus via his old school flip phone (that real
killer tech), now Reina is in charge. Reina then, instead of taking the tough
approach with Coulson, talks to him in her usual nice/manipulative ways yet
confirming some of the issues Coulson does have with his return after Avengers.
Here is where things start to wrap up a bit too easy. Skye finds out where Coulson is, takes the rich guys nice car, and calls Ward
to tell him what she has found. The whole crew gathers around the phone, then
Agent May comes in, takes the phone, and asks what she knows. After some creative interrogation techniques by Ward, Agent Hand admits that she has plans to launch attacks using centipede. Agent May asks Hand that they be
allowed to go and save Coulson using Skye’s Intel. Hand agrees and the team is
off. While this is happening Coulson is in this weird bed with this mind thingy
so that it can help him remember and record his dreams (??) as he goes in the
fantasy of Tahiti starts to fade to show him on an operating table with Dr. Stretain
(Ron Glass) telling another doctor that they shouldn’t be doing this with that doctor
saying that this is what Fury wants. During this you hear Coulson saying “let
me die let me die” over and over again as the shot pulls back we see this weird
spider robot shocking parts of Coulson’s exposed brain.
The team then descends on the place and fisticuffs ensue as
Skye searches for Coulson. Ward and May defeat their foes and Skye walks in on
Reina and Coulson, punches Reina in the face, and gets Coulson out of the machine.
Mission accomplished. The team finishes up with Agent Hand, celebrations are
had, Skye is relieved of her bracelet and Reina goes to SHIELD jail... but all is still
not well. Coulson pays a visit to Dr.
Stretain asking him about the disturbing truth he just found out. Dr. Streatian tells him he wasn’t even there in the beginning of it and that Coulson had been dead for days when Fury used every
resource to bring him back. There was one thing wrong they couldn’t give
Coulson his will to live back and they made up the fake memories of Tahiti to
cover up the memories of his return to life.
Then after the credits we see poor Mike didn’t die. He’s all scared up from
the explosion and he lost a leg. The kicker is this when he looks into the
mirror he sees a message meaning that he now has one of those crazy robot eyes
that can kill you if you don’t do what it says. Poor Mike.
Did you Know:
