Man, it sucks to be a Jean-Claude Van Damme fan in 2015. Seriously, you have to sit around watch other ancient action heroes like Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger remain relevant in blockbuster films, while Van Damme is regulated to the bargain bin genre flicks. Sure, he showed us his dramatic potential with JCVD back in 2008....but that was 2008, and that it's still used as a reference point proves how little of note he's done since. He's back in another totally generic action-thriller with Pound of Flesh, a film that's so poorly done it misses an opportunity to at least have some fun in a B-movie sort of way.
Pound of Flesh is absolutely ridiculous from the start, but plays everything with a deadly seriousness that is infuriating. Van Damme plays Deacon, an ex-Black Ops agent (of course) in Thailand for a very serious cause. Not some secret mission or "one last job", but something pretty altruistic. He's there to donate a kidney to his dying niece, but a night of drinking with the sexy Ana (Charlotte Peters) ends with him unconscious and missing one of those vital organs. Yes, the title "Pound of Flesh" is quite literal here. So Deacon has to kick ass all throughout Thailand to find who stole his kidney, and do it in time to save his niece.
Pretty goofy, right? That's because it is, yet screenwriter Joshua James misses chances to make light of all the silliness. Deacon and his brother (John Ralston) have a bitter rivalry because of Deacon's past indiscretions, so they fight and quote scripture at one another throughout the night, which grows quickly tiresome. They're joined by Ana, who suddenly has a change of heart and is the de facto love interest; and Kung (Aki Aleong), a wise old gangster who basically serves as their chauffeur. Deacon beats up plenty of thugs, although the fight scenes aren't especially well choreographed by director Ernie Barbarash. Van Damme's still pretty flexible, and puts his epic splits to...let's call it "unconventional" use. The film consists of Deacon getting into fights, then getting dragged, practically lifeless, like a corpse in Weekend at Bernie's. How could they not see the humor in all of this nonsense?There's no reason to ever watch Pound of Flesh unless you're some kind of Van Damme completist. He gets a decent brawl out of the film's top bad guy, played by the late Darren Shahlavi, but otherwise Pound of Flesh isn't worth the sacrifice of your time.
Rating: 1 out of 5
