1/21/2011

No Strings Attached


Remember that episode of Seinfeld where Jerry and Elaine, former lovers and now bickering friends, decide that the only way to save their friendship is to have sex. "Sex...to save the friendship", I can hear Jerry saying now. In Ivan Reitman's occasionally raunchy, occasionally witty new comedy, Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher are two unfairly gorgeous people taking the idea of emotionless sex to a different level. "Sex...instead of a friendship" is the order of the day.

We all know how that usually turns out, especially when you're as pretty as these two are. Emma(Portman) and Adam(Kutcher) seem to be caught in the grip of sexual destiny. They meet young as burgeoning adolescents where we catch a glimpse of their personalities. She's emotionally distant, he wants to finger chicks. Years later they run across each other at college where she bamboozles him into attending a funeral, which he probably did in hopes of nailing her. After going their separate ways, they meet each other completely by chance on the street, and the sparks are immediate. It isn't long before the two have given in to the built up attraction and have a brief but apparently very fulfilling romp. 

Emma's a doctor with a terrifying fear of relationships. Adam is a perpetually optimistic, cheerful guy working as a writing assistant on a 'Glee'-style TV show.  The two decide to be "bang buddies", or friends with benefits. This could work, right? She's busy and just needs someone to fill her....bed, every now and then. He's very clearly into Emma and sex, and sex with Emma. Adam's about to experience the sexual Holy Grail, a dream scenario average guys would chop off their noses for. So what could derail such a perfect set-up? Obviously, somebody's gonna start catching some feelings, the interesting thing is that it's not who you expect.

Their non-relationship takes a turn for the cheesy when Adam shows up at Emma's house while she and her roommates are having their period. Of all things, he makes her a "Period Mix" of songs, I guess showing how sensitive he can be. Corny and crass all at the same time, which might be a good description for the film as a whole.

It's obvious pretty early on how this story's going to end up, but a wealth of brilliant supporting characters keep the journey light and hilarious. In particular Greta Gerwig as Emma's best friend, Patrice, is a bonafide scene stealer. She was fantastic last year opposite Ben Stiller in Greenberg, and here her sense of comedic timing is always on point. Few can make a joke like "It's like a crime scene in my pants" work, but she pulls it off and remains the one character I wanted to see more of. Kevin Kline also hits some funny notes as Adam's ex-TV star dad, who has a penchant for sleeping with Adam's ex-girlfriends. My question remains though, "What the hell was Cary Elwes doing in this"? I have to assume his role got seriously chopped. The sexy Lake Bell impresses as a nerdy, buttoned up show producer madly in love with Adam.

It all revolves around Kutcher and Portman, though. Kutcher is the type of actor who fits into a certain mold and can be really effective. He's actually pretty good here in a role not all that dissimilar to the one he played in Valentine's Day. He's basically a lovable, cheerful blank slate who lets the emotions of others push him through life. Kutcher can knock that type of character out of the park. I don't want to see Kutcher do Shakespeare or anything, but this he can handle. After all the serious movies and indie flicks Portman has been doing it's jarring at first to hear her talking about another guy's penis, and I think at first she sounds a little unsure of how to deliver those types of lines. It quickly fades, though, and eventually I just kept thinking how hot it was to hear her talking about sex so frankly. That was sort of the point, though. It's an unexpected character for her and she pulls it off in spades.

Ivan Reitman is an old school veteran director who has been behind some truly classic comedies, and his expert hands guides the film at a steady pace.It couldn't have been an easy task because there are way too many subplots at work, most of which should've been completely thrown out the window. Elizabeth Meriweather's script angles hard in the opening moments to establish the film's raunchy credentials, which actually provide some of the most realistic dialogue. Unfortunately it abandons this in favor of cliched rom-com staples, even gracing us with the Jerry Maguire "You complete me" moment we've seen way too many times before. Not many people can pull that off, and....well, the actor who does it here isn't one of them.

There's another movie coming out soon that covers this exact same topic. It's rather easy title is 'Friends with Benefits', and it stars Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis. The two flicks have actually been jockeying against each other for awhile, matching red band trailers and so forth.Both will probably end up the same, so if it boils down to actors I'll take Portman and Kutcher in a heartbeat. Not a great film, but No Strings Attached is good enough to take your "bang buddy" out on a date for. If your rules allow that kind of thing.