So once upon a time when I was young, my parents and I - I'm sure my older brother was at these gatherings, but for some reason, I only remember my parents - would go to movies on Friday evenings. I think Friday evenings still counted as matinee showtimes back then, and we would all grab a movie for less than $20, a pricepoint that makes me want to weep when I see $18 for a single 3D IMAX ticket now. ANYWAY, I'm pretty sure the first movie we saw together as a family was Mrs. Doubtfire, and I remember this because I started sobbing near the end of the movie and my parents wanted to take me outside because I was being a jerk but I refused to leave until I saw how the movie ended. I was only 6 or 7 years old then, but I had broken my parents' VCR a few years ago by playing Hook on repeat over and over and over and over again, so I clearly had a Robin Williams fascination. And then when I watched Aladdin? Yeah, I was a weird young Robin Williams fan.
IMAGINE MY ANGER, THEN, when I hear that a sequel for Mrs. Doubtfire is being planned by Fox 2000. The sequel would reunite Williams, who is currently on TV on CBS's The Crazy Ones with Sarah Michelle Gellar (not sure if that has been renewed for a second season yet, actually) and director Chris Columbus (who directed the first two Harry Potter movies, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets), and is being written by David Berenbaum (who wrote Will Ferrell's Elf).
Why? Nearly 20 years later, why is this happening? What could possibly EVEN BE THE PLOT OF THIS MOVIE? Remember how the film had a very lovely message about how divorced parents still love their children and families can come in all shapes and sizes, and dressing up as an old lady can be great for your career if you're a middle-aged comedian trying to make it in television? ARE WE THROWING THOSE LIFE LESSONS ASIDE? I don't get it, and I don't want to. Curse you, Fox 2000. Curse you straight to hell.
